How I helped researchers show that rectal exams aren't always necessary

This week I experienced perhaps the culmination of my life's nerdiness.

It started last year when I helped one of my company's clients, University of Colorado Hospital, collect some data for a clinical study. At the time, I wasn't fully aware of the scope or even the hypothesis of the study. I only knew it involved something to do with getting information pertaining to feces out of our system. Literally pulling, well, you know what, out of the system, if you will.

Drs. Cleveland and Yaron were great to work with throughout the process. (I did not work with the third co-author, Dr. Ginde.) They recently published their paper in the Annals of Emergency Medicine.

The reason this is duly notable is because of the conclusion of the results findings:
Removal of point-of-care fecal occult blood test from our ED was associated with a reduction in digital rectal examinations -Actual Research Finding

Or, translated into laymen terms:
Doctors don't have to stick their fingers up as many you-know-whats because they found something else that works good -Me

So yes, I was the nerd that wrote a Perl script and a bunch of SQL queries that provided them the data to demonstrate that. Thanks, technology!